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How Communication Is Likely to Be Interpreted If Visual, Vocal, and Verbal Cues Don’t Match

You can provide excellent guidance about how clients should think long term during a crisis, but if your body language, words, and voice tone aren’t in sync, clients may assume you’re not fully confident in the advice you’re providing.
Source: How to Practice Active Listening, Duke Today, 6/18/19
By Ryan Sullivan
The Great Recession. Brexit. A tumultuous presidential election year. There are always reasons for clients to be concerned about investing. As this piece was written, the spread of the coronavirus (COVID-19) is impacting not just lives but also the financial markets. While much is unknown at this moment, there is one thing we can be fairly sure of: it’s not the last crisis we’ll ever face.
In times of crisis, successful advisors speak to their clients more frequently—to reassure them, to help them keep a long-term perspective, and to help dissuade them from making any regrettable investment decisions. But as the adage goes, “It’s not just what you say—it’s how you say it.” You may have truly great insights that provide clients perspective and encourage patience, but here’s the challenge: If you aren’t able to deliver that information with confidence, clients might not be convinced enough to heed your recommendations.
What we’ll cover:
- It’s not just what you say—it’s how you say it
- Tips for communicating with confidence
- Knowing what to say
First, It’s Not just What You Say—It’s How You Say It
Perhaps you’ve heard the rule of thumb that “93% of all communication is nonverbal.” While that’s an oversimplification of the research from which the statistic’s derived, it’s still useful to understand the basic premise in a crisis situation.1 Here’s the gist: Sometimes when we communicate with another person, we send mixed messages. For example, imagine that you’re mad about something. If someone were to ask what’s wrong and you said, “nothing,” but you did so with an angry tone, crossed arms, and clenched teeth, you’d be sending a mixed message.
So how can someone tell which part of a mixed message is accurate? When it seems the messages we send through our body language, tone of voice, and word selection don’t match, one is perceived as being most accurate.1 As the pie graph to the right shows, it’s our body language. That’s followed by our tone of voice; then, the actual words we use.
Let’s apply this to our current crisis. Imagine you said to a client, “I’m confident this recommendation is your best option.” If you nervously tap your fingers on the desk and your voice wavers while you utter this, it’s very possible your clients will assume you’re not fully confident in the advice you’re providing—or worse, that you’re not being truthful.
So our goal should be to communicate with congruence—that is, our words, tone of voice and body language should all send the same message. How can we ensure that’s the case? By being more aware and intentional about the messages we’re sending.
Second, Tips for Communicating With Confidence
At times like this, advisors and clients alike can feel anxious or upset. But many clients count on their advisors to comfort them and guide them through challenging times with poise. In a crisis, it’s not enough that our messages are merely congruent—they also need to be confident.
In each of the sections below, the column on the left shows things that could reflect a lack of confidence and therefore affect your clients’ confidence in you; the column on the right shows tips that can help you project more confidence. These can be used to communicate with confidence at any time, though they are especially helpful during a crisis.
There are a lot of things to pay attention to here, but don’t overthink it. The goal is simply to be more aware and intentional about the various messages you’re sending, so you can limit any potential miscommunication. Pick a few things from the lists that you think might be challenges for you currently and work on those first.

General tips
Less Confident |
More Confident |
---|---|
Being unsure what advice to give |
Taking time to build conviction about best advice |
Waiting for clients to call |
Being proactive with communication |
“Winging it” or scripting every word |
Listing bullets to cover most important points |
Running yourself (and your voice) ragged |
Blocking time for sleep and self-care |
Jumping directly from meeting to meeting |
Taking a moment to pause and get recentered |
Trusting clients will fully focus on your words |
Sharing a visual for them to view as you speak |
Being tentative on phone calls, since there’s no visual feedback to reassure you |
Glancing at a picture of friends or family while you’re speaking on the phone |

Your Words
(via phone, in-person or virtual meetings)
Less Confident |
More Confident |
---|---|
Diving right into business |
Asking first about the person, their family, etc. |
Saying things like “I’m sure you’re scared…” |
Asking “How are you feeling about all this?” |
Talking in technical jargon or scripting every word |
Explaining concepts clearly and simply |
Using softening words such as maybe, just, I think |
Making declarative statements, when possible |
Asking “Does that make sense?” |
Asking “Am I explaining that clearly?” |
Rushing through talking points |
Repeating main points and recapping at the end |
Trying to end the meeting/call as soon as possible |
Leaving time for any questions< |

Your Voice
(via phone, in-person or virtual meetings)
Less Confident |
More Confident |
---|---|
Tone = dismissive or condescending |
Tone = decisive and comforting |
Talking too fast |
Slowing down |
Using filler words such as "um" or "like" |
Adding pauses to allow information to sink in |
Speaking in a higher pitch due to nerves |
Speaking in the lower end of your natural range |
Talking too quietly |
Projecting your voice |
“Uptalking,” so statements sound like questions |
Ensuring statements don’t end on a higher pitch |
Having a hoarse, weak voice from overuse |
Being hydrated/using a cough drop between calls |

Your Body Language
(via in-person or virtual meetings)
Less Confident |
More Confident |
---|---|
Keeping a desk or table between you and clients |
If possible, remove physical barriers |
Looking overly stressed or worried |
Appearing calm and smiling (when appropriate) |
Fidgeting in your seat |
Sitting up straight |
Hunching over or slouching |
Remaining relatively still |
Tapping the desk or repeatedly clicking a pen |
Keeping your hands “quiet” on the table |
Waving your hands excessively while speaking |
Gesturing smoothly with your palms upright |
Looking away often or distractedly |
Maintaining focus and eye contact |
Third, Knowing What to Say
While this piece focused on “how to say it,” knowing what to say is also imperative. If you’re looking for content that can help with this, Hartford Funds has a broad range of engaging material in our Volatility Resource Center. Our local advisor consultants are also well versed on what pieces are available, and how to position them with clients. They can help you role play client conversations and share best practices, as well.
In times of crisis, effective communication is crucial. Use these tips to ensure that the messages you send—via your body language, tone of voice, and word selection—are congruent and confident. And one last tip for the road: Let’s make sure we’re all washing our hands!
Next Steps:
- Download a PDF version of this article
- Visit our Volatility Resource Center and Communicating to Connect landing page for more communication tips
- Talk to your advisor consultant about helping clients maintain perspective in volatile times
1Is Nonverbal Communication a Numbers Game? Psychology Today, 9/30/11
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